Sunday, June 13, 2010

My Love

It has been 3years and 9months since the last time we talked
You broke my heart on my birthday and after I could barely walk
My friends ask about ya
See niggas that remind me
But they can’t get a chance
Because I’m scared they’ll do
What you promised you would never
Should have known better
But I take it as a lesson learned
Only 17 and I already was a woman scorned

Then I met someone
Who was a nothing like you
Thought I had found someone I could trust
And again I was proven wrong
The only good thing I started writing poems
Downside I got attached to his kids
But what should I expect after being his for 4years
They flock to me like I’m their mom
Probably because I spoil and spend the time
By 18 I was a fulltime mother and wife

Went home and met my Bestie
First person too truly see me
Myself around him unlike with anyone else
When we together I care less about anyone but him
Well except for his kids
And the ones I already had
So by 19 I had 4 and hadn’t pushed one out yet
Not by choice but it is what it is
And I ain’t lied to him yet
But don’t think that I could so I guess I’m cursed on that trek

Everything say we supposed to be together
But just last month I met a new friend
Well…..truthfully he my baby
Us being together driving niggas crazy
And that’s slowly turning me dolo
Yes, that’s means I’m riding solo
While I may not have an alibi
It’s less drama in my life
And ya know that’s my style
Fucking right

Understand I got a fucked past
But I do what I do
Then calmed down a lot
And everything I’m speaking the truth
Not saying I didn’t deserve my status
But the shit then upgraded and I’m far from being the saddest
Like I was when I was out wilding

Slightest bit of attention had my legs open
Side-effect from raising myself during the “tough” years
But I sucked it up and dealt
Only a few tears felt
Which is a miracle in itself
Cause I sit back and think how I got here
Where falling in love is my only true fear
Death I wished for a thousand times
Cause all the pain is gone in my sleep
So a never ending one would put me at peace

Only problem I know some will weep
But I’m from the city where shit happen the murder cap
Where at the age of 2 you know what it mean for somebody to be strap
So that being said I know this won’t last long
Just need a nigga from back home
“I’ll take the Bestie for a $1000 Alex.....
Daily Double?? hmmm well I’ll bet it all”
Unlike the others, I know with him I won’t fall
That’s why he my Bestie and my boy
My heart and my toy
He my love, which is why I play my part

Wrote this back in April, sorry just getting round to posting it. Hope ya'll enjoy *muah*

-Until next time
Mz. N.O.B.

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Questions to the Bestie

How did I dream of you before I even knew you existed?
How I saw your youngest before she was even born?
Why do I love you as much as I do?
Why do YOU love ME with all my faults?
What is our future?
What is that makes me feel this way about you?
When did I truly first see you?
When are we gonna be an official couple?
Where is my head when I'm around you?
Where do you keep my heart, cause I gave it to you to protect?
Who are you to have my mind, body, and soul?
Who says I should know as much as I do about you?
Am I too clingy to you?
Am I truly the one you want to marry?
Will this really work out or will I regret it?
Will I be able to handle the pain if it does not work?
Is this real or puppy love?
Is this who God had in mind for me?
Do everbody get to feel this happiness while still on Earth?
Do I tell my parents about you now or wait?
So many questions maybe this is why I don't sleep right anymore. *shrugs* I get to him and I'll be fine.
until next time
- Mz. N.O.B.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Next!!!!!!

So this past week has been interesting to say the least. How you my man but go a whole week without talking to me, but you can reach out to my sister? Then you throw hints out over the internet hinting like you know something. Well please let me know what I did, because for once I really was a faithful girlfriend.
It's cool though. Cause when the truth come out YOU the one who will be looking crazy. I keep saying I'mma follow my first mind but I never seem to able to. Fuck it. Karma just coming back on from my "pimp" days I suppose. *shrugs* Oh well my heart gets what it wants I guess. Just which that thing will hurry up and happen already.

*deep sigh* Until next time
- Mz. N.O.B.